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Who am I Part 1

   Who am I?  What is the purpose of existence? What is my role in the same? How best can I play this role? For the last six years, day and night these existential questions play in my system whether meditating, thinking, reading, working or discussing.... I presume that this must be true for many. Answers and understandings of these issues have come to me in meditation with great vehemence and clarity. I must have examined these understandings thousands of time from all scientific and logical angles, but have not been able to change a millionth of its fraction. Since the time I have got these answers in meditation, I have used the mind for verification, validation, searching for the right words (however inadequate),explanation and logic to explain to myself. I am not a grammarian - I cannot create arguments, refute others nor quote scriptures, philosophers or religion. In short, I am not a wordsmith, not someone who could write a brilliant recipe book - but one who has tasted and expe
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Who am I (part 2) ---- I am you

  Today, in a simple, laymen language without using religious or didactic language - let me try and explain my concept of reality and its implication on my life and thought process.... Till the sixth century BC - Greek, Indian and Chinese philosophers professed that science, culture, philosophy and religion were not separated but an indivisable one. Then the Eleatic worldview of the west started prevailing with assumption of a Divine Principle standing above all Gods and men. This principle eventually led to an intelligent,personal, benevolent God standing above the world and directing it. Thus began the separation of matter and spirit and led to the dualism in western thought. The dualistic religious movements in the west along with the Eastern religiosity consisting of various Gods, their messengers and their books created a worldview where humans were only connected directly one-to-one with the creator and sent to the world for various purposes - leading to claims and counter claims
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Who am I (part 3) - the mystical experience

  Around 6 and half years back, in Feb '04 - I had an intense, life transforming spiritual experience that changed the course of my life. From an atheist, from someone who was never exposed to religious thoughts or books, for someone who mocked religion and spirituality - this experience led to a series of amazing changes and events in my life and had a tremendous impact on my life, thoughts, feelings and my complete existence. The prolonged enlightenment led to some major transformation taking place in my body, in my feelings, heart, mind and thinking, almost a discontinuity from the past. Was this experience and the subsequent transformation real? Could these be part of a hyper active, overworked mind? Could some scattered reading or hearing added up in the subconscious mind and played a mind game? Never having read religious books, articles or exposed to these subjects - it was surely not an end product of a trend of thought, nor was it an intellectually arrived conclusion. So h
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Who am I ? (part 4) - Impact on my life

  The Feb '04 spiritual experience, at the age of 44 years, was a precursor to a constant upward movement of energy in the body, leading to interesting repercussions. The linolic flow of energy from top down had changed once and for all to a reverse flow called the "kundalini flow" and I could feel the same all the time. My body hair which used to point downward, has now changed direction and the entire back hair is facing upwards, due to the change in energy flow. My body, not used to this direction and increase of energy could not cope and went through some terrible months of tremendous heat, discomfort, and a constant fear of "waking up dead or mad". And, because it was spontaneous and not guided nor prepared, the obsession to understand it was all the more. While most of the understanding of the new reality came through meditation (I had involuntarily become a meditation junkie - meditating hours on end, especially at night, many-a-times losing control of my
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Who am I? (part 5) - Kundalini - preliminaries

  The evolutionary energy that began operating within me after my spiritual awakening has become a constant companion and in the last blog (part 4), I did mention about its impact on my worldview and behaviour. In view of the immense significance of this transformation in my body which ultimately resulted in the development of various psychic and other abilities, it is absolutely necessary to dwell on this vital process which will have a major impact on the future evolution of mankind. For simplicity, I will call this spiritual awakening as Kundalini awakening - for that is the popular name given to this mystical, regenerative process, which is the end product of a deeply experimented and researched Hindu science. I repeat, that it has nothing to do with a particular God or set of Gods or a religion, but a universal phenomena that can be achieved by anyone who meets the standards and follows the processes. There is nothing in the whole mass of knowledge, gathered by mankind so far, of
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Who am I ? (part 6 ) - Design, intelligence and evolution

  While, in the earlier blog - I did try to explain the critical importance of kundalini or mystical awakening to the future of mankind , it is very necessary to protect the image of the true mystical vision from distortion by the ambitious or the dabbler or the uninformed. Awakenings are not altered consciousness (that can be achieved temporarily by using mind altering drugs), nor superficial and transitory experiences but illuminated consciousness. Distinction must be made between the fanciful, colourful and sensational narratives of sorcery, magic, miraculous and weird paranormal, bizarre and fantastic experiences and an increased clarity of thoughts along with an indescribable state of glory, love and happiness with the wonderful direct experience of an all pervading consciousness. Since the past six and half years, I can say emphatically that I have been testing my body, mind, experiences, events and theories probably more scrupulously than any scientist. Exploring multi disciplin
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Who am I ? (part 7) - free will and determinism

  As I sat on the window porch, overlooking the hills merged with dark, rain-filled clouds at Khopoli on a mid august Sunday morning of 2006, my mind was still whirling with the questions. The questions refused to leave. Is life determined? Do we have a free will? These questions had been chasing me every single day for many months. Answers during my meditation led me to believe that there was both - determinism or destiny as well as free will. But, various saints, be they Ramana Maharishi, Nisarga dutta Maharaj, to philosophers like Ramesh Balsekar and others - talked about God and his control, not just over me, but the entire universe. A complete and rigid control, which does not allow any leeway or deviation - making me just an actor, a pawn, playing a readymade script - unable to even alter a single word in the unfolding drama. Determinism is roughly defined as the view that all current and future events are causally necessitated by past events combined with the laws of nature. Whi
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